Why Women Piss Me Off

I told you all last week about why I thought my marriage had ended. This week I thought that I would let you in on a few stories about my experiences with women other than the woman in the above photo, my ex wife.

If you're anything like me, you love to hear stories about love gone wrong, especially when they involve someone you know.

Since this is the computer age the wonderful world of dating has been turned on it's ear, since the invention of chat rooms and online dating services. I'm not going to talk about any of that this time, I'm only going to stick to my real life experiences.

There have been only a few women in my life that have really mattered to me, even though I have dated quite a few, most of them lasted only a couple of dates and then I would move on to the next one. Yes, it's true I was usually the one to end the relationship, for one thing or another, usually just some bizarre excuse that I focused on to rid myself of the feeling of being trapped and/or being bored with it all. (Much like the characters from the TV show Seinfeld would do.)

I had just recently started working at Wabash Magnetics back in 1997 and it was only a year after my divorce. The location of my job permitted me to watch within close range as different people would walk up and down this hallway.

One day after break I walked out of the break room, not really paying too much attention to what was going on around me. Suddenly there was this lovely smell of perfume that hit me in the head like a brick, just smelling it sent me into an animalistic frenzy.
There she was, the most beautiful woman in the world, who was wearing a perfume that just made me want to throw her down right there in the pile of cardboard boxes and make her squeeze my weasel with her pork loins.

I was overcome with this uncontrollable urge that I MUST say something to her.

I casually asked her what brand of perfume she was wearing, and even though she answered me with a pleasant smile, I'll never know what she told me because all I could think about was this woman IS THE ONE.

After that coincidental meeting I kept my eyes open, looking out for her in the factory, hoping she would walk by so I could catch a glimpse of her short, stocky and not too out of shape body. Long wavy dirty blonde locks that stood up high like she was in one of those 80's hair bands. Hypnotizing, dark green eyes that always kept me in a trance....and also, one more very important thing....I always seen her either smiling or laughing. She always looked as if someone had just told her a dirty joke. I liked that.

I asked around and found out that her name was Cammy Dunn...that's her real name and I'm using it just for the fact that I want everyone to know who this person is and what she did to me. I wouldn't be at all suprised if some of you who live in my former home town know of this girl.

She worked a different shift than I did, but occasionaly she would work over or trade shifts with another person for whatever reason.

As much as I could, I would go out of my way to make comments to her, just small talk, always something corny sounding but in a friendly manner.

After a few weeks of watching her walk by and seeing her get more beautiful each time she passed me, I couldn't take it any more. I had to ask her out.

I asked her how her social life was and if she would be interested in maybe a movie or dinner. She laughed and then pleasantly declined but a few hours later she handed me a note explaining to me why she said no and that she had just gotten out of a relationship with a guy who would stalk her and follow her wherever she went.

She also wrote in the note that this guy she used to be with would harrass the guys that she went out with, even long after they had broken up. She was intimidated to go out with anyone but she said she was interested in me and included her phone number on the paper. It wasn't her home phone number, she didn't give that number out because of the stalker trouble, but it was her work number at the dry cleaners ( she was working two jobs.)

So I started calling her, we would talk for a few minutes at first, then after a few weeks, it gradually increased into hours, stopping our conversation only when dry cleaner customers would enter and want to pick up thier laundry.
Keep in mind because she lived 25 miles away, the phone company considered it long distance and charged the calls as such. My phone bills would reach over 150 dollars, which, for me, was insane, because I'm not a phone talker at all... but I really didn't care. I just wanted to hear her voice.

She was a country girl and she liked country music, I was an alternative music fan and hated country music, but I put aside my differences and forced myself to listen to country music. Just for her

On two seperate occasions I sent a dozen roses to the factory for her and if you know anything about flowers, you know that a dozen roses costs quite a bit for something that will just die in a few weeks.

I persisted in wanting to go OUT with her, go somewhere, do anything....but she always had a legitimate excuse .... Her stalker ex boyfriend ruined her trust in men and she wanted to take time in getting to know me....that made perfect sense to me. I didn't question her one bit.

After six months of pursuing her, the word got out where we worked that I was interested in her...you know how factories can be, gossip runs wild and free, so & so gave what's his name a blow job in the parking lot while the maintenance man got caught wanking off in the bathroom, there was even rumor of me being gay because a girl who used to live across the street from me who used to work at the Target store peeked into my package of photos that had just been developed and she supposedly seen some naked photos of guys in a shower and assumed it was a fag party, you know how rumors can snowball.

A girl who worked with me on my shift who lived in the same town as Cammy asked me one night why I was pursuing her. I said something romantic about me knowing that she was the one. I was then informed I was being misled and manipulated. Confused, I asked how. This girl began to tell me of the live-in boyfriend that Cammy had and that they have been together for at least three years.

It was like I was hit with a wrecking ball. I refused to believe what was being told to me, and that there had to be some logical explanation.

There was no logical explanation. It all made sense now. She had led me on to believe that we would eventually go out, but only after getting to know me. I had wasted six months of my time pursuing a girl who already was three years into a relationship with another guy. All those phone calls at her other job, the flowers...what did she do with the flowers? She couldn't have taken them home and let him see them...could she? All the smiles and laughs we had at work, all the little notes she would write to me, I had even given her a tiny stuffed bear at Christmas time that she had hanging on her rear view window in her car. It was all a big scam. A big fucking lie. All of it.

I'll shorten this story up a bit by saying, that was where it ended between us. Being disgusted with it all I just gave up, I never seen her again because I unknowingly got myself fired from Wabash Magnetics. I wasn't aware of the attendance policy, apparantly after you reach the limit on your call in days, if you are even one minute late, you get the boot. I was two minutes late and two days later they decided to tell me that I was fired.

A couple of months later she actually had the nerve to call me at home and asked me how I was doing and if I had found another job. I told her yes, and I was making more money. There were some awkward pauses in our telephone discussion & it was obvious there was tension in the air...I finally realized what was happening here and I just told her to fuck off and don't bother calling me again, I hung up the phone and that was the last I ever heard of her.

Fast forward a few months to another girl who's name escapes me at the moment. She was a blind date. I agreed to it because my best friends daughter had a girlfriend whose mother was recently divorced.

We seemed to get along just fine despite the fact she was a little rougher than I like my women, she was a drinker, I wasn't, but i decided to give it a chance and see what would happen.
The very first date consisted of her telling me the story of her and her ex husband and why they got divorced. It seems that (keep in mind I JUST met her)
her and her ex husband were swingers, yes, you heard me right, swingers as in swapping spouses with other couples.
She fell in love with the other guy and found herself seeing him more and more.
I guess it's considered cheating when you are screwing the person behind thier partners back as opposed to right in front of them.

Another long story short here. One night I was on my way to pick this girl up for a date, I stopped to get some gas for my car. I just happen to look over into another car....there was my date who I was to pick up in twenty minutes, with another guy, hanging all over him. What the f ? How humiliating.


Women....they piss me off.